Lily took her abuser to court, then she realised she wasn't the only one

When Lily Maglaras' mother suggested she buy a house plant, she had no idea it would soon become a metaphor for her recovery from sexual assault.

Miss Maglaras was 17 when she was sexually abused in her own home in March 2021 by someone she thought was her friend.

The years that followed were a living nightmare.

After reporting the crime to police in November 2022, the perpetrator was not arrested until April the following year.

When he faced court in July, he pleaded guilty to offences relating to not only Miss Maglaras but three other victims.

It was the first time she'd heard she was not the only one.

She also learned the then 18-year-old perpetrator had been placed on multiple therapeutic treatment orders for previous sexual offending.

Miss Maglaras, who granted ACM's The Standard permission to identify her as a victim-survivor of sexual assault, was horrified.

"It was very, very hard on me," she told The Standard.

The magistrate at the time described the crimes as a "pattern of entitled sexual offending" and ordered he serve 15 months in a youth detention centre.

But the perpetrator successfully appealed the severity of that sentence and was instead placed on a youth control order.

That meant he didn't spend a day in custody, instead serving his sentence in the community under intense supervision.

Miss Maglaras bravely read victim impact statements to the court during the judicial process.

She said she was shattered by the appeal which left her feeling undervalued.

"I felt like he pretty much got away with it," she said.

"I felt very unheard."

The assault wasn't the first time Miss Maglaras had, or would be, allegedly sexually abused.

She will face a court again in 2024 to give evidence about an alleged assault involving a different man.

She said the recovery from her trauma had been tough with days when she was unable to get out of bed and an admission to hospital after a suicide attempt following a mental health episode.

"I didn't tell anyone about what happened for about a year and I was surviving, not recovering, in that time," she said.

In the aftermath of her sexual assault Miss Maglaras said she often felt alone in her thoughts and experiences.

But after finding the courage to speak up, her parents became her strongest supporters.

Her mother sent her daily quotes and messages of support and then one day, suggested she buy a house plant.

"I remember thinking 'what is that going to do?'," Miss Maglaras said.

Her mother explained that if you watch something grow, it will grow with you.

And that became the metaphor in Miss Maglaras' recovery.

"If I water a plant it will continue to grow but if I just leave it, it will die," she said.

"I thought 'am I watering myself? Or am I just staying in bed, hoping that one day I will be better?'"

From there, Miss Maglaras started slowly putting herself first.

"I feel like it's easy to put the abuser in the spotlight... I was so focused on the court processes and what would happen but I just needed to ignore that," she said.

"They are not worth a second in mind."

The metaphor also became the inspiration for Miss Maglaras' podcast 'Get A House Plant', which was launched on April 7, 2024, in the hope of making victim-survivor's know they weren't alone.

She said in the early stages of her grief she looked to the internet in the hope of finding someone who had been through the same horrors but was unable to find anything that resonated with her.

And upon sharing her experience online, she received an influx of messages from women who had been through something similar.

One person reached out and said Miss Maglaras had inspired them to tell their parents and report their assault to police.

"That was like 'woah'. I had made a difference in someone else's life," she said.

When the first podcast episode aired, Miss Maglaras came home to find a gift from her mum in her room - a house plant.

"Now I am looking after myself and focusing on getting back to the best version of me," she said.